Negotiating is more than exchanging positions. It is a game of movement, timing and perception. The way you make concessions — the pace, the size and the sequence — largely determines how the other party assesses your position. The four concession rules provide a clear framework for moving strategically and achieving the best possible deal.
Rule 1: Never give anything away without getting something in return
The principle of "Give and Take" is fundamental in every negotiation. Every concession you make without a counter-concession not only lowers your outcome but also your credibility. The other party learns that applying pressure works and will continue to do so. Therefore, explicitly link every concession to a counter-concession. Frame it as an exchange: "If I move on this point, I expect you to move on that point." Additionally, present every concession as an exception, not as standard practice. This preserves the value of the concession and helps the other party understand that there are limits to your flexibility.
Rule 2: Maintain the tone of the conversation
The way you communicate during a negotiation is at least as important as what you say. Hard no's create resistance and escalation. Replace direct rejections with constructive alternatives. Instead of "That's not possible," say: "That's difficult, but I can explore X." This keeps the door open without losing ground. Additionally, use your body language and tone of voice deliberately to project calm and authority. A composed posture and steady speaking pace signal that you are in control, even as pressure increases. Whoever manages the tone of the conversation also manages its course.
Rule 3: Start broad, move to fine
The size of your concessions tells a story. When you consistently make equally sized steps, it suggests there is still plenty of room to move. The effective strategy is to start with larger concessions and gradually scale them down. This signals that you are approaching your limit. A concrete example makes this clear. Suppose your opening offer is 100,000 euros. Your first concession brings you to 95,000 euros, a shift of 5,000 euros. The next step moves to 93,500 euros, a movement of 1,500 euros. Then to 92,750 euros, a difference of just 750 euros. And finally to 92,500 euros, a minimal movement of 250 euros. The diminishing pattern clearly communicates that your floor has been reached, without you having to state this explicitly.
Rule 4: Close at the right moment
Knowing when to close the deal is a skill in itself. You recognise the right moment when concessions on both sides become minimal and positions are close together. Wait too long, and you risk the other party introducing new demands or the energy draining from the conversation. Initiate the close with decisive language: "I think we're there. Let's put the agreements in writing." Always ensure written confirmation of what has been agreed. Verbal agreements are vulnerable to differing interpretations and can lead to conflict later on.
In closing
The four concession rules together form a discipline that sets experienced negotiators apart from amateurs. It is not about tricks or manipulation, but about a deliberate, structured approach to the concession process. Those who master these rules maintain control over the negotiation and consistently achieve better outcomes.